Slow FAST Decline, Facebook post and video.
February 24th, 2023, originally from my Facebook Page, Holding Onto Hope. Feel free to click here to see the original post.
"Good evening everyone, I wanted to share what I wrote last night after I had the worst panic attack I’ve had in my life. Apparently I’ve been unintentionally internalizing my feelings and not expressing, to many other than a few close family, my church, and my friends; what I’ve been experiencing the past few months.
Without further ado, here is the poem I wrote. And I’ll be sure to link my blog post in this too, just in case you missed the post I shared before this one.
Slow FAST Decline
Written by Evelyn L. Schwenke, February 24th, 2023, at 12:10am. If you knew how hard it was, would you say ‘At least it’s not as bad as…’ “fill in the blank”?
Or remind me of how strong I am, after all, trauma makes you strong to fight back.
It doesn’t feel like strength when you feel like you’re going to fight or flight.
So here I am waiting, questions unanswered, wondering if what I feel in my gut is true.
I don’t want to believe that anything could be that wrong, that it’s making my heart feel so blue.
Months and months, and years and years, and over a decade too.
Falling apart bit by bit, my ankle feels torn in two.
Joint by joint, tendon, muscle, atrophy, declining fast, yes, it’s true.
I’d of fallen apart, my spirits gone, if it hadn’t been for the journey I’ve been through.
Here in spirit, standing by my side, helping me become who I’m meant to be.
Even if my body betrays me and falls apart, at least my heart, soul, and spirit will be free.
Acceptance after several years, tears, and heartbreak, it’s taken a long while to arrive.
I may not know what lies ahead, however I’m taking advantage, and cherishing my time.
https://thoughtsofanangelmommychapterfive.blogspot.com/... This is the link to my blog, Thoughts of an Angel Mommy, Chapter Five, and my latest post, Losing My Ability To Walk."
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